These are my people

Being a mom of 4 kids 9 and under, I don't have many dull moments. If I do happen upon one it usually is followed by some sort of chaos, someone screaming, a huge mess, someone starving or bleeding...I have a few dramatic children, so nearly anything can be made into a crisis (we've had a few rough moments about which way the wind was blowing in the window). You can't make this stuff up. 

However, as they are growing bigger, more of my moments are filled with interacting with them, watching them, playing with them, rather than actually tending to their needs. No one is nursing anymore, only the youngest is in diapers and they can all feed themselves (for the most part). 

Every once in a while I get to watch them without them being aware. A glimpse at who they are trying to be, a moment of make believe, of mimicking an older sibling (or me!), a moment lost in their own thoughts. Lately, as this happens I keep being in awe of these people. These little beings that have been so attached to me are growing into small humans. They each see the world in their own unique way, have their own reactions and responses to each situation as it presents itself and each add to our family in such a special way. 

They're each growing at their own pace, but the end point is obvious from the biggest down to the smallest of them. One day they will each grow fully into their own person. They won't need me anymore. All the ways that I spend my days busily caring for them will disappear as they will have learned to not only care for themselves, but for others. 

This simple fact amazes me. I know this is what motherhood is about. Shaping and molding children to one day contribute to this world, but to watch it begin to unfold before my own eyes, well, it's a little bit miraculous. These are my people. The people I love and care for. The people who I grew for months on end and rocked and nursed at all hours of the night. These are my people and I love them, I find them amazing, interesting and complex. 

These are my people. 

The Same New Beginnings

We're settling into routine out west and this year was the first year since I've been a mom that the beginning of the school year has looked the same as the previous one. We still had moments of wondering what the class would be like missing a few friends, a few tears over the end of summer (not only from me...), and a small amount of anxiety over the new beginnings that the school year brought, but it was nice to have it all be familiar. It was nice to expect and anticipate the routine that would be coming. To know what our days would look like and to be eager to return to familiar friends and activities. 

The big kids started school a few weeks earlier this year, but Ginny's preschool still waited to start until after the late labor day. This gave the littles and I a few weeks to do a few final visits to the zoo and playgrounds and soak up the last few days of summer. It was wonderful. We missed the bigs, but it was also so fun to see Wiley and Ginny lean on each other as playmates, making the transition from a house full to just the other for entertainment. 

This mama heart is full. It is great to have confidence in where I send my kids each day. They each have good teachers this year that will help shape them in the coming months. Ginny is in love with her preschool teacher and is already eagerly anticipating joining Lucy and Murray next year at their school. I'm pretty sure everyone will know her before she steps in for her first day and she will feel like the queen bee in kindergarten. She's a hoot how she chats up anyone who will listen once we're on campus. 

New beginnings none the less. It's all the same, familiar, but different. 

Lucy's in 4th grade and beginning to make that transition towards middle school. She's started playing soccer after school and is joining handbells (forgoing band because she didn't want another instrument to practice at home). We're starting to see friendships become more solid and she's becoming more aware of her peers and social things. 

Murray...well he's our steady eddy. Still all about running and being one of the fastest boys in his class. He's pretty easy going and I'm not sure much can shake him. It's fun to hear how he's immersed back with his friends and I love that they're growing up together. 

Ginny and Wiley. I won't be able to lump them together much longer. I am here, because well, that's where I sense the change. They play so creatively together. Often I overhear them playing house with Ginny being the mama and Wiley playing the part of a puppy or baby, they just find joy every day. I feel this year that these days are fleeting. In the past I've felt the start of a school year as a time to come up for air and just relax a bit, this year I feel the rush. The rush to just soak it all in before I start to lose them to school days and friends. Wiley's afternoon naps are numbered, Ginny's lazy mornings at home, outings in the neighborhood and trips to the grocery store after dropping the bigs at school...these things, they're all numbered now. Where before I felt like I was drowning in little people, I now see the end and I'm not ready for it just yet. So, for now we'll take each day as it comes. Settle into our school year and soak up as many snuggles and lazy days as we can manage. We'll also keep playing and being creative, cheering on the bigs in all they're accomplishing and just keep growing the best we can out west. 

"The Best Day Ever"

Some things you don't realize how good you have it until it's gone, others you recognize their full greatness while they're still in your midst. The Best Day Ever!!! Definitely falls into the latter category. So, let me back up just a bit. What is the Best Day Ever? Well, when Lucy enrolled in public school she made friends with a sweet and quiet little girl. We'll call her "E". As I got to know her mom through a mutual friend, I quickly learned where E got her caring and friendly heart from. 

Throughout the school year the girls had a few play dates and some other fun outings. As first graders it was fun to watch their friendship grow. I had Wiley not quite 2 weeks before school got out for the year. We were in baby heaven! E's wonderful mom asked me what we were doing for the last day of school, my response was to spend the afternoon staring at said new baby (or something of that nature). She insisted on taking Lucy along on what she described as The Best Day Ever! It involved lunch out (a rare treat), parks, splash pads, ice cream and more! I of course agreed to let her take my child on this grand adventure and met them for ice cream when all of us at home had woken up from a nap. Lucy indeed had The Best Day Ever!

Last year, we all joined along with them. E and Lucy had been in separate second grade classes, but were still good friends. Murray and E's younger sister R had been in the same class and were also good friends. The youngest of their girls fell right in between Ginny and Wiley. We were quite the site! Applebees for lunch with 7 kids, the park, the splash pad, ice cream. Back to her house for pizza, popsicles and sparklers. It was The Best Day Ever!  That ended in tears as we said goodbye to these amazing friends. 

From the moment we drove away, Lucy and Murray asked, what will we do for The Best Day Ever next year? It won't be the same without them. I whole heartedly agreed...and my mommy heart started praying. Praying for fun friends to share new memories with and to keep in touch with these old ones. 

Well, yesterday was our first Oregon version of The Best Day Ever and it was a success. When you're competing with memories, you have to get creative; so we did. We had a picnic on school grounds with the girls in Lucy's class. It was a wonderful way to celebrate the end of the year and to say goodbye to one friend who won't be returning next year. We brought friends home with us and played for awhile before heading out to the pool. We had promised the bigs they could both have birthday parties this year; as the day approached I thought, why not have Murray's on the last day of school before everyone scatters for the summer. With all the swimming lessons we've taken this year I learned our local pool is actually an inexpensive option for an out of the house party. So, party we did! 

We invited Murray's class and siblings too, along with a few neighbors and friends. We swam for an hour and enjoyed ice cream sundaes topped with candy and sugar and lots of laughs from the boys. 

We had to take a "break" for Lucy to sing at the 8th grade graduation with her class, and Murray to have baseball practice. But we finished the night (really late) with a hunt for glow bracelets in the yard and everyone went to bed with a soft glow in their beds. 

What a great day with bittersweet memories. I love that we are making such great friends here. I love watching new friendships form and all the love and laughter being shared. But yesterday I did wish we could be sharing The Best Day Ever with our Michigan friends (although, they have another week of school, so I don't mind we didn't have to wait).

As we said so many goodbyes last year, I remember telling Lucy that we could be sad as we said goodbye, but that all the people we loved we were taking with us in our hearts. The things they taught us and the memories we shared would come with us to Oregon because they helped make us the people we are. Yesterday that came to a full fruition. 

Thank you Mandy for teaching E and R to love their friends, to welcome them to a strange new school. Thank you for seeing a mom with a new baby and inviting my girl into your family tradition. Thank you for sharing your joy with us. The Best Day Ever is now a cross country event and I hope one day we get to share it with you again (wouldn't that really be the best day ever?!?).

God is Always Near

So, I haven't written in awhile. Here's the synopsis; we drove 4 kids in a minivan across the country to a house we purchased before I'd ever seen it and I've been settling kids and life in this new amazing corner of God's creation. 

Here's what I've learned. God is always near. In the fast and furious moments where you can't sit still, in the quiet moments where you question if you made the right decisions and in the perfect moments of happiness...

God is always near. 

Our new neck of the woods includes a commute to the kids' school each day. In Michigan we either homeschooled or the kids attended school up the street. Our commute involved walking up the block with a pause only at the praying tree if we hadn't already prayed at home to start the day. (Or a hop over the fence and a mad dash through the playground field if it was a running late day). 

Here, it's almost 18 minutes of driving. We leave our neighborhood, drive along the outskirt of our town and then head through some farmlands, up a twisty forested hill, and then up and down the rolling hills of a vineyard. It is gorgeous. Each morning the kids and I take in the beautiful painting that God has created, unique to each day. When I first made the drive I was always clenched and nervous, unsure on the twisty, hilly roads; they were so different than anything I'd ever driven in my own midwestern existence. Now, I look forward to the drive each day and find it relaxing!

There is a point in the drive when we get to the top of the curvy hill through the forest and we emerge to this long rolling straightway. In a split second we glance and we know if it's a mountain day or not. Some days we have an amazing clear view of the rolling hills, the patchwork of farms along the country side with both Mount Hood straight ahead and Mount Saint Helen off to the left. Some days it's a one mountain day, some days we can't see them at all. One of our favorites in the morning is a ghost mountain as we call it, where there is a haze in the distance and it looks like the mountains could be a ghost or something out of a scary movie. We love to take in what God has given us. 

As I've made this drive over the past few months I can't help but reflect on how this drive is a lot how the past few years have been for me. Ups and downs, twists and turns and not always knowing what will come next. In the winter here, we have fog...lots and lots of fog. There are times when you can barely see off the side of the road or what is ahead of you, you can't see the orchards or vineyards as you go up and down the rolling hills, you can barely see that there are trees in the forested section of the drive. And it is hard to imagine that the mountains are even in the distance. But they are! Even when we can't see them, the mountains are still there, still great and mighty and covered and snow. Often the fog of the morning burns off to a beautiful afternoon, so the trip that I took to take the kids to school is completely different than the one I take to pick them up. 

Isn't this so similar to our lives? Even a familiar path, in my case having another baby or moving for a new job, something you've "driven" before, seems so unfamiliar if you can't quite see the full picture God has painted for you. If you can't see the rolling hills, the vineyards, the farms and the magnificent mountains the road you're on may seem dark, twisty and a little unnerving. But, God is always near. He promises that He will never leave nor forsake you! One of my favorite verses in Isaiah tells us that when we walk with the Lord, whether we look to the right or the left He will be there saying "this is the way, walk in it". So, if you wait, just a little longer, you can get to the top of the hill on a bright sunny day and see not only what's right in front of you, but the magnificent mountains He's been waiting to reveal! 

I love this. Each and everyday I am reminded of God's steadfast and enduring love for me. I think of all the people who have lived before me in awe of the same mountains I am blessed by as part of the landscape of my life. It reminds me that some of my biggest blessings were things I didn't see coming, a fourth child, a move to Oregon....a trip to see a dear friend. 

Even when the road seems foggy and unclear, God is always near, and if we just keep driving He will reveal Himself in His time. So, this is me, being transparent and saying it's time to start revealing our daily blessings here in Oregon. So hold me accountable, help me to share my heart even though sometimes it's hard to be willing to share the foggy moments when God hasn't revealed that beautiful picture to me yet. 

This Little House

I remember walking into this house for the first time. I can't remember what number house it was, but I looked at on my birthday 7 years ago...in the midst of a day where I looked at over 13 houses without Nick. The realtor and I driving around a town that was foreign to me, looking for a house to make our first home.

We had lived in 3 apartments in our short time of being married and each had had positives and negatives, but this was going to be home. A place to paint, to decorate a nursery, to build a life in.

I remember walking through and knowing without a doubt that this was it. This was where our family would grow. I imagined kids growing up here, the space was perfect for kids to grow in.

Here we are 7 years later. We will move out 7 years after we closed on the house, just shy of 7 years from when we moved in. We did what we hoped, putting paint on almost every wall (only the half bath downstairs remains the same color as when we moved in). We decorated a nursery for Lucy, then for Murray, added a color to the girls room for Ginny and brought Wiley home here as well.

These walls have heard laughter and tears. We've had amazing gatherings of family, friends and youth. This house and yard have been such a gift to share with all those we love.

The location has been ideal. Close to church, walking to school once the kids were enrolled, a sledding hill down the street, parks, the pool and the library all within biking distance.

This place has been home.

It's surrounded by love. The best neighbors we could ever hope for. The type of neighbors you borrow, sugar and eggs from as well as many other random forgotten ingredients, gardening tools, other tools, their expertise and wisdom and most importantly their company, a listening ear and love. I will miss my neighbors more than words can express. They've helped me bandage wounds, driven me to the ER with a bleeding child in my lap, come to my rescue on countless occasions and been the people I've shared in daily life with.

I have spent the last 7 years of my life growing babies and nursing them. This phase of my life has been incredibly home based, focusing on my role as a wife and a mother. I've spent countless hours in this home growing babies and rocking babies. This home has certainly seen me at the greatest moments of my life and a few of the hardest. We've brought babies home here and had the heartache of never meeting a baby lost. I've seen each room of this house at every hour of the day. Walking the rooms with a restless baby or while laboring. I can close my eyes and picture the kids' rooms in moonlight, the warmth of a summer breeze coming through an open window and a newborn baby in my arms. I can picture my "big" kids asleep in their beds as I tuck them in one more time before I head to bed. I walk through the house and remember who bled where, who puked, the messes that were made, the projects created, the block towers built, the make believe worlds that were created and the cars raced across the floor and the imaginary battles fought.

As we leave this home after 7 years, Nick and I will be celebrating a decade of marriage. I feel like he and I have "grown up" here. Grown in our love and understanding of each other and of what a marriage is all about. We've learned how to fight here, fight with a purpose to reach a compromise and understanding. We've learned how to love unconditionally, to work towards a common goal and help each other be better and stronger than we could be as individuals.

This house, this home will be hard to leave.

God has a plan, a purpose in all of this. Heaven is our home. I know this. This house is only bricks and wood. Walls that will one day be destroyed. The memories, the love that was made here will carry with me. I have often been reminding Lucy in her tearful goodbyes that the love we have shared with people here has shaped who she is and will stay with her for the rest of her life. I know that is true for myself as well, but it is still tearful. Hard to say goodbye to a place that has been my world for 7 years.

This house has been our first home and I will forever carry it in my heart.



Murray Man is 6

I can't believe it's been 6 years since I became a believer that a girl can fall in love with a boy in an instant. That moment I held you, stared into your eyes and made a final debate about your name. I'm so glad we chose Murray, you're such an amazing Murray Man and it suits you so well.

You're such an amazing little man Murray. You are kind, sensitive and full of life and love. You are all boy, loving anything rough and tumble, competitive in almost everything you do. You love your bow and arrow, nerf guns and wrestling and fighting "ninja style". You also can spend hours building with legos, kicking a ball or racing around in the backyard.

I am so proud of who you are growing into. You are considerate of others and are extremely well attuned to others wants and needs. This is evident everyday in the way you play so kindly with Ginny and Wiley and on occasion used against Lucy to "push her buttons" and get her fired up, but usually you get along well with her also.

We celebrated your birthday a few days early while up in Traverse City with a Moomers ice cream cake and great friends around. The Bauer's and the Troxel's. It was fun to share your special day with them since your actual birthday Daddy had to leave for a trip.

We love you Murray Man, I can't believe you're 6! I can't believe what a smart, funny, sensitive, and strong young man you are becoming. I can't wait to see what this next year of life has in store for you. It is a joy to share  life with you and watch you grow.

Wiley-12 Months-1 year Old!

Can it be that it's been 12 months already? A whole year since I woke up knowing you were going to arrive? Then after just a few short hours of labor and 3 quick pushes they placed you on my belly, seeing you on the outside it was love at first sight. I remember such great joy of meeting you, of knowing you, of finally holding you and seeing all the goodness that had grown inside of me. 

Oh Wiley. We love you so much. We call you "smiley Wiley" and you live up to that name each and every day. You are so relaxed and easy going. You appease your siblings and only squawk when they overstep and take things a tad too far. You love to bop around to music, walk and climb most of the time and just be near people and interact with them. 

Lately you like to bend over and "stand" on your head...a few times it's even led to a somersault. Everywhere we go people comment on how easy going you are, how good natured and happy you always seem to be. I just keep saying you're that perfect 4th baby, the baby God knew we needed to complete our family. Love you little man!

You love to read books, love to snuggle, love to pick something up and pretend it's a gun...I know, seems crazy, but you watch your brother do it and you try  your hardest to make noises just like he does. You really try to mimic the way the older kids play and they think that's a blast. 

You love clapping and smiling. Love sunglasses and phones. 

You still have your 4 teeth on top and 4 on bottom with quite a few more sitting just under the gums...I can see patches of white lining your gums waiting to break through. 

You love to eat. You're loving all the summer fruits and berries, really enjoy peas and carrots, but your absolute favorite food is chicken. Yum, you can not get enough. You'll eat spicy things and then rub your tongue and yell until you get a drink. You're very adventurous like that. 

You're growing bigger and stronger. Weighing in at just over 20 lbs. 

I can't believe it's been a year. Happy Birthday little man. We love you always and forever and are so thankful you are ours.

Lucy is 8! Eight is Great!

I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made

Psalm 139:14

That verse dear Lucy girl was on your birth announcement 8 years ago, I will also mention that you were the only child whom I actually mailed birth announcements for...but that's what you get for being the first.!

What a sweet, spunky girl you have grown into. I can never forget the day you made me a mom, how my world changed, how my universe grew and how you opened my eyes to instant, unconditional love, constant worry about someone elses' needs over my own, and indescribable joy. 

I look at who you've grown into and it amazes me. You are compassionate for other people, you're passionate, you're emotional, intense and incredibly creative. You continue to amaze me with how you see the world and insights you share. 

This year you are taking art classes, swimming lessons and piano. You work hard at all of them and each of your teacher's has great things to say about you. You've blossomed in second grade and are becoming a true leader. 

At home you love your siblings. You are sweet and playful with Wiley, goofy and playful with Ginny and a great companion for Murray...when you aren't arguing the way brothers and sisters do. 

Recently you were in the talent show at school and we were all incredibly proud of you. Proud not only of your talent of piano playing, but of your strength and confidence to go on the stage alone and play. 

You are strong, you are gentle. You are wild and quiet. You are spunky, you are sweet. 

You are growing into a young lady. Your lifetime of 8 years is amazing to me. It seems like just yesterday I held you in my arms in amazement of the tiny person you were. Today you growing too big for my lap. Your giggle brings me joy and I truly enjoy your company and sharing in life with you. 

I am so thankful the Lord chose you for our family and I am excited to see what HE has planned for your days ahead.

I love you Lucy girl, my first, sweet baby girl. 

Wiley-10 months old!

10 months old! Wow! Even though I didn't let you turn 9 months old (there was no 30th last month, so I forbid it),  you just kept growing, so I agreed that today you could turn 10 months old. I mean, it would be odd to celebrate your first birthday in June and since you insist on growing, I guess i can't fight it...

So, 10 months old. I have pictures to post from previous months, really I do! You my dear child are such a joy these days. You are into everything, into cabinets, drawers, stairs, standing at the window, lifting the toilet seat multiple times a day (potty training Ginny has been a whole new experience with you around...I'm pretty sure my boxing out is NBA worthy...or at least March Madness worthy).

You still only have 8 teeth...ha! only! They are bigger and sharper and you use them so well, you use them while nursing, on my shoulder, on my legs, on the high chair, oh and for food as well...

You are crawling EVERYWHERE! You're fast too! You are standing. The big kids all clap for you and get so excited when you stand on your own. You're close to taking steps...Daddy and I call it falling with style. You just can't get the balance and speed thing under control yet, but soon you'll be cruising. You're already cruising around furniture and one of your favorite places is at the front window looking out at the sky and playing with the dollhouse. I can't wait until the leaves are on the trees and you get to see something bright and beautiful out the window and experience warmth outside! It's been an incredibly cold winter. 

Your smile is amazing. Your eyes light up when you see any of us and it is such a joy. 

Your personality is complex. You have a quietness about you, but you are also fierce and incredibly stubborn. We certainly know what you want. 

This month has brought on your first double ear infection :( But you've handled it like a champ. You also have graduated to only wearing your helmet at night and we love seeing your hair again! Soon we'll check on your kidneys and we continue to pray for them to grow healthy and strong. 

Your siblings adorn you with love. They are so good at playing with you, making you laugh and engaging you in different types of play. You have almost given up on the baby toys, trading them in for super heroes and doll house characters (including Mickey and princesses). 

You're eating great! We've traded in most of the baby food for finger food, although we try to get some baby food in to pack in the calories so you sleep better (I'm starting to notice a difference with that!). You are a super fast nurser these days, not wanting to miss the world around you, but still snuggle in when you're tired and ready to sleep. 

I am SO enjoying watching you grow. I think back to the itty baby you were not too long ago and I am amazed to see that baby melting away and a toddler slowly appearing in front of me. I say slowly, but it is in reality happening way too fast. 

Slow down sweet boy. Let me enjoy a few more months of snuggles before you get too fast for me. I love you little man and can't wait to see what adventures this month will bring us!

What I love about my littles

Wiley:

Chubby little hands that grab my fingers while he nurses and my pant legs while he struggles to stand on his own. 

Smiles from across the room and his eyes that light up as he crawls toward me. 

The look of mystery on his face as he puts something in his mouth to discover if it's delicious or what it feels like. 

That little toothy grin.

His hair. Oh his hair. Taking the helmet off and seeing his hair. 

Little toes, chubby thighs and rosy cheeks. 

Raspberries for kisses. 

The way he eats, the way he thinks about it, chews it and decides if it's good or not.

Reading books and tasting them.

Standing at the window, barely peeking out and staring into the sky.

Headbutts for love.

Now onto Ginny:

Her slimy, sweet and affectionate kisses on my cheek or as she grabs my face and kisses my lips. 

Her laugh, that infectious laugh. 

Her stories, her explanations of the world around her. 

Her singing and dancing. 

Her need for dresses, to be in something sparkly and beautiful. 

Her love for praying and her siblings. 

Her desire to do whatever I am doing.

Being close to me, wanting to mimic my every move. 

Her joy in the little things of everyday.

Her emotions when something doesn't go her way. 

This is my list. My list of things that I will miss when my littles grow beyond today. Because I see it slipping away, but in my state of exhaustion I sometimes let myself get caught up in the hard stuff, the tantrums, the teething, the runny noses and the "I DO ITs!" of the day, and I'm afraid I'll miss these last moments I have with these littles. Soon enough they'll be as big as my bigs and I'll be sending them to school and I will love the new adventure, but I will miss these moments of cuddling and growing every moment together. 

So, today, on a hard day I am writing a quick list in a brief moment of quiet, of the things that I LOVE about the right now. About the hard day at home, so I remember to cherish it, to take it all in, before they move on to whatever comes next! 

Wiley-8 months

Here it is, you're 8 months old and I haven't even posted your 7 month pictures yet (your 6 month ones long forgotten). It's happening too fast and the time just seems to be ticking away. While this winter has been filled with freezing cold days, lots of snow and a longing for spring, I can't help but hope spring takes it's time arriving, because with the warmer weather comes my last little man's first birthday. Sigh.

Here's what we've been doing this month. January was filled with COLD days, lots of cold days. Lots of days of staying home to stay warm. Lucy and Murray had days off school almost every week because of the cold and while it didn't help us keep a routine, it did help you be entertained. You're loving your older siblings and they're loving you.

Lucy and you have a special bond. She has decided you're hers and she plays with you each day. Making sure the 2 of you have some time just for each other. She likes to help you "walk", holding you in a standing position and moving you around the room. She also lets you sit on your belly and you bounce up and down while she holds your hands. You always seem to have lots of smiles and laughs for Lucy.

Murray is your tough big brother. He loves to play with you and it's usually a gentle rough. Murray uses you in all forms of his fighting against bad guys....sometimes he even assigns you the roll of evil villain! You oblige happily and smile as he pretends to defeat you, unless of course it really does get rough, then you alert us all right away!

Oh Ginny. You and Ginny are together day in and day out. You share your space quite well together and she lovingly refers to you as "My Baby Wiley". You're starting to find your place, giving her kisses, pulling her hair and taking her toys, but she does enjoy having you around and often shares with you throughout our playtime. She also helps keep you safe, telling you "No baby Wiley, don't go  by the stairs" or "No baby Wiley, don't eat that!" Ginny also enjoys helping to feed you and tells me when you need a diaper change...recently she's started blaming you when she has a stinky diaper as well.

You're getting so big, you're moving around, often on all fours or on your hands and feet trying to push around or hold yourself up, but your preferred method of moving still seems to be the army crawl and man are you fast at it!

You're finding mischief more and more, opening cupboard doors, eating every small piece of lint on the floor and attempting to explore the stairs. I can tell that while you're very mild mannered you have an element of curiosity that is going to make your toddler years and adventure.

You've been waking more often during the night, but then in a single night 2 teeth popped out in a single night just a day after 1 had popped through. At 8 months old you have 2 teeth on bottom, 3 up top with a 4th just aching to come out. If we keep going at this rate you'll have all your teeth by 1 (hopefully things slow down a bit...)

We love you little man. I know I say it every month, but your daddy and I just can't imagine life without you in it. You bring us so much happiness and joy. These past 8 months have been flying by and I'm trying my best to enjoy each sleepless night, and crazy day because I know it will be gone before I know it. My newborn baby, and small little infant are disappearing before my eyes and a toddler is slowly starting to take over...I'll keep you little as long as I can, but I know you're growing way too fast!

2014-Trust

I like the idea of choosing a word for the year. I've done it the last few years. 2012 was intention, last year, although I didn't "publicly state" it, the word was survive. This year, I've decided to focus on TRUST.

Merriam Webster defines Trust as the

belief that someone or something is reliable, good, honest, effective, etc.

So, in 2014 I will be working on trust. I will trust the people around me more. I will trust my circumstances and mostly I will work on trusting all these things to God. Allowing my questions, my doubts and my thoughts of what is "right" to be put to the wayside and trust His plans for me.

Things are calming down in our world. No babies this year, no big changes in anyone's school, our day to day is becoming normal again and I find that's when my lack of trust can hold me back or become more evident. I can become anxious in the small things, waiting for something bigger, questioning if this is good, or if someone is honest or reliable, questioning if I am effective.

So, this year, I will trust.

Wiley-7 months old

7 months old! It happened again! and AGAIN we were traveling while you slowly grew up, hit another milestone...another month gone...another month closer to growing up.

You're SO big Wiley man, and this month was a big month for you.

You had a GREAT ultrasound and visit with your urologist Dr. Wan. He was so impressed with the improvement your kidneys have made that he decided to do another ultrasound in April instead of waiting only 3 months and doing a repeat in February. Hooray! (and Mommy showed off her ultrasound skills, because even though the technician wouldn't tell me anything I came home and told Daddy..."I know they're getting better, there was a lot more gray than black in his kidneys, I think the fluid is a lot less this time!" and I was right! Thanks for teaching me so much about kidneys on ultrasound little man!)

You also had a great head growth. You're making leaps and bounds with your helmet and as soon as we have one more growth spurt for your diagonal rations you should be helmet free! You'll be glad to show off your hair which is growing in darker and thicker, but I think deep down you'll miss seeing Miss Molly for helmet adjustments, you can't take your eyes off her when we're there.

Besides these medical milestones, you're growing in so many ways. You're almost 20 lbs. already, you're soooo close, but just haven't crossed over yet. You're sitting up on your own. You love to sit with a basket of toys in front of you and squeal as you play.

You're rolling, army crawling, and up on all fours bouncing your bottom around and even jumping off your legs...but still no conventional crawling. I have no worries, you'll get it, and when you do you'll be FAST and I'll have to put up gates. For now, you get where you want to go and we can let you roam free.

You travel like a champ. You must be our best car rider and our best sleeper when we're traveling...it's amazing! You had a great time in St. Louis visiting the Troxel's and ringing in the New Year. On our way we visited Greta and Tom and they took us swimming for your first time and you seemed to enjoy it quite a bit. You love their puppies and all the extra love and attention you get when we visit people.

You still only have 2 teeth on bottom, but I think those top ones are starting to move, you've been chomping quite a bit lately and I'm excited to see when those top teeth make an appearance.

You're eating everyday now, you've tasted lots of food with squash being your favorite. You've tried sweet potatoes, green beans, mangos, bananas, apples, and carrots. (maybe a few more I can't remember). You love to eat, excitedly opening your mouth for each bite and lately you've enjoyed grabbing your spoon between bites. Your siblings love to feed you and while it makes things a bit messier, you laugh with them as they do it.

We love you to the moon and back Wy guy. It's such an honor to watch you grow, to see hints of your personality coming out and grow. You're such a cheerful, content baby, determined when you're trying to get something and observant of the crazy world that surrounds you. I'm thankful each day for the gift you are to me. 

Wordless Wednesday

My littles are getting SO big!


Ginny's first night in a "big girl" bed
 

Ginny playing with the dollhouse
 

Wiley eating some sweet potatoes, I forgot how fun it was to have a baby who enjoys eating!

Wiley 6 months old

Wiley guy…6 months old. It’s hard to believe! It’s hard to believe and you’re really a little over a week past your 6 month landmark already! I have had a hard time sitting down to write this out, partially because it’s been so busy, partially because you’re the 4^th and mostly because I’m in denial.

I can’t believe my little man is 6 months old. I can’t believe 6 months ago we welcomed you into this world as a snuggly newborn and now you insist on rolling all over the place. You definitely don’t stay where you’re put anymore. You love to roll, wiggle and squirm. Anything and everything goes into your mouth to explore and you love jumping in the exersaucer, Johnny jumper and on our laps if we hold you up. You’re working on sitting up with the help of Lucy and Murray (and Mom and Dad), I think you would have it down if you would just sit still for a minute, instead of leaning and reaching for the nearest object!

You got your first tooth the last week in November, just in time for Thanksgiving and your 6 month birthday! Your bottom center tooth on the left poked through after a few days of rosy cheeks. You also tried your first food on Thanksgiving…just a few days before you turned 6 months! You tried sweet potatoes and ate them like a champ, but were pretty gassy the next day so we decided to wait just a little longer before incorporating it into our daily routine.

You got your helmet this month. A cute little blue helmet that makes your cheeks squish out even more. It’s going to shape your head into a perfect round head and get rid of that pesky flat spot in the back.

At the doctor you weighed in at 19 lbs 10 oz and measured 27.3 inches tall! That makes you in the 81% for weight and 76% for height. Your head circumference is 45 cm putting you in the 80% for head size! 

At 6 months old you’re more smiley than ever and are starting to share your giggles more generously. You recognize your siblings and watch them intently, I can only imagine what you’re thinking and what life will be like when you can chase after them and join in their fun.

You met lots of new people, and saw some old when we went to Chicago to visit with Grammy and Pop Pop for Thanksgiving. We had lots to do and lot of people to see. You even met one of the people you’re named after my Uncle Breen from Mexico! (He’s William Breen). Everyone comments on how big you are and how happy you seem, both are very true!

I can’t believe I can love you any more each month and then I do. Watching you grow and change is just such a joy. Everyone tells you that you look just like your brother…I always point out that you have blue eyes not brown, but I do wonder if you’ll continue to look like him as you grow. Your personality is beginning to show through and you continue to be easy going and happy. We are so blessed to have you in our family!

We love you to the moon and back!

Wiley-5 months old!

It seems like every time I blink it's time to write yet another monthly update on Wiley! Oh, smiley Wiley, you're another month older, you're learning more tricks and becoming more interactive with each passing day. We went to the doctor just the other day for a nasty cough and ear infection you've had and you're 18 lbs already! Growing every chance you get.

 

You're rolling over now. You don't like to show it off much, but we often leave you in a room and come back in to find you 5 feet away from where we left you, a few times you've rolled off the carpet and knocked your head on the wood floors. You're not too far from "getting around" and we're excited and anxious for what adventure that will bring.

You're a pretty great sleeper. You still have nights where you're up often, but most nights you visit with mommy just once and you fall back asleep quickly.

You've stolen everyone's hearts. Ginny lovingly calls you "MY Wiley" and both Lucy and Murray snuggle you and talk to you when they're home from school. Daddy and I can't imagine life any other way.

5 months old little man...this year is going WAY too fast for me! We've packed away the 6 month clothes and you're solidly wearing 9 month and a few 12 month outfits! You're so tall, and everyone we meet comments on how big you are! You're holding yourself up nicely, trying to sit  by yourself with someone behind you...Lucy LOVES this job, and hanging out in the exersaucer.

We took you to get your head measured this month. You have a little flat spot in the back, so you'll be sporting a helmet soon so when you get bigger you'll have a perfectly shaped head.

We love you to the moon and back little man. Slow down...because the next stop is 6 months old and then you just keep getting closer to your first birthday...man oh man slow down!

Wiley- 4 months old

4 months! In the same sentence I can confidently say that I can NOT believe that you are 4 months old already and I can NOT believe you've only been here 4 months!

 

You my son, have made your mark. You are part of this family and I can not remember life before you. I can remember pieces of anticipating your arrival, but I can not remember the day to day without you in it, and I'm certain everyone else would agree!

 

 

We LOVE you so much! We call you Smiley Wiley and there hasn't been a day that you haven't lived up to your name. Sure you get cranky or fussy, but you're still always full of smiles once you're rested, or changed or snuggled.

 

You take after your big brother with the best pouty lip I ever did see. Occasionally your older siblings play a bit rough around you, and more than once I have failed to protect you from a flinging arm or leg and you make sure to let us all know. It's hard to discipline when everyone just thinks you looks so cute with that little lip hanging out!

 

You're becoming quite the "squealer" you enjoy hearing your voice and adding to the noise in the house with your squeals of joy throughout the day. Murray especially loves this and is always encouraging you to "scream more Wiley!"

 

This month we've transitioned to you and Ginny being home all day with me while Lucy and Murray are at school. It's a bit slower pace, but also a bit busier as well. We are the ones entertaining Ginny so you've been quite busy going to play group, taking walks, helping with art projects and cooking with me from the ergo. You are easy going and enjoy the ride.

 

Early in this month (the first Friday in September), you went for your biggest adventure yet. You sir, had a renal scan. You were a champ about it and very brave as you went off without mommy and daddy and were sedated. We were especially nervous about not feeding you for so long before the test, but you did GREAT and while you were a bit angry after the test was over and the anesthesia had worn off, we allowed it, snuggled you and I nursed you and by the time we left the hospital you were our happy boy again.

 

We will be watching those kidney's of yours. They're both too big, and they both are slow at processing because of a narrowing in the ureter. So, we'll watch them and pray and we'll keep re-evaluating to see if they need to be fixed by the doctor or if they're fixing themselves as you grow.

 

Speaking of growing...you're HUGE! At your 4 month appointment you were 17 lbs already and 27 inches long. That's the 85th percentile for weight and off the charts for height. You are definitely our big little man!

 

We love you Wiley! We're so thankful that you're here and we're enjoying all you bring to our family. Can't wait to see what this next month brings!

 



First Day of School!

A few pictures from our first day of school 2013! 


Murray at his hook at school

The boys took Murray to his first day of kindergarten

Murray on his first day of kindergarten 9/3/2013

Lucy on her first day of 2nd grade 9/3/2013

and just so we can prove Ginny was there and looking cute! She dressed like Lucy on her first day (and wore a backpack up to school too).

I'm Not Ready Yet!

It's been a busy summer around our house. We kicked it off (a little early for Lucy, but Murray had finished school...so we'll count it as summer) with a new baby brother! We're so glad Wiley joined us this summer!

 

Following Wiley's arrival we had a slew of guests we absolutely LOVE to see.  A little bit of travel while Nick was out of town, a short weekend adventure in Chicago (more on that later) and then when we landed at home we started the preparations for Jr. High VBS, and by "we" I mean Nick worked like crazy and we tried to hold down the fort, feed him when he was home and get in any "daddy time" we could when he was available. August was VBS (the kids LOVED it), then Nick was gone for 4 days and I tried my hand at being the sole parent to 4 children...let's just say things went really well, but I was just as excited as the kids with Nick arrived home!

 

Finally last week we had a breath of fresh air. The summer busyness died down and we spent a week of vacation together as a family. We did not turn on a TV once, I was offline the whole week (Nick did check his email a few times and post a few pictures from his phone). It was GLORIOUS! We came back rejuvenated as a family with memories that will last us a lifetime. (Thanks to our friends and their generosity so we could enjoy this time together).

 

Now...it's back to school. This is the first year we've done this back to school thing. The first year we've jumped right in with the rest of the world. The first year we're not homeschooling, the first year that going to school is every day, all day...and for more than 1 of our kids.

 

To say there are nerves in our house is an understatement. As the mom, I'm keeping my feelings to myself. Telling the kids what a great time they'll have. Getting them excited about their teachers and their friends that they'll get to see. But, inwardly I'm crying...throwing a bit of a tantrum if you will. I'm not READY to send them off for the day. Oh, sure, I have thoughts of what the days will be like quieter, how great it will be to spend time with just Ginny and Wiley...but then my thoughts wander to Ginny in the backyard with Murray, to Lucy snuggling Wiley on the couch...to Lucy reading stories to Ginny and Murray making Wiley smile and coo with his crazy noises.

 

This is when I know I'm sending part of my heart away for 7 hours a day. Ok, that may sound dramatic, but it's true! I know our family dynamic will change, I know that our house will run at a different beat. It will take a while for us to find our school "tune" if you will. We'll find it, we'll settle into a rhythm and a routine soon enough, the kids will enjoy school and I'll enjoy the time with my littles at home...but I still might make a paper chain counting down to Thanksgiving break...I may hide it in my closet so the kids don't know about it, but I can't say I'm excited to send them off to school. I'm excited for them to have a taste of independence, excited for them to learn and grow, but I'm not quite ready to let them go. So I'll just keep counting the days until I get them back for awhile again.

 

So today and tomorrow you'll find me with my family. Working together, playing together and wishing that summer was just a little bit longer...

Wiley-3 months old

Another month has flown by! I can't believe how busy August was an how much you've grown yet again! You're smiling lots and lots now. Smiling at daddy, your siblings and me when we talk to you. Lucy, Murray and Ginny love when you make faces or coo back when they talk to you. It just makes them giggle in delight. 

You're getting longer and bigger it seems, and just this week before you turned 3 months you ROLLED OVER! I can't believe it!

This month we had a busy month. You came and helped me be on the welcome team at VBS. Lucy and Murray attended VBS and Ginny played in the nursery. All the ladies loved seeing you, and they were amazed at how easy going you were.

Daddy went out of town for a few days and you were super great while he was gone. Making things a bit easier for me to hold down the fort.

We vacationed to Traverse City. Once again you were a trooper in the car and you loved all the outside time in the shade watching the trees blow in the wind and falling asleep whenever you needed and then just waking up happy again.

To say you enjoy getting a diaper change is an understatement. As soon as we place you on the changing table you start kicking your legs and smiling at us. I don't think you've ever cried while getting a diaper change (unless someone pokes you in the eye or headbutts you...yes, that does happen, I'm sorry Wiley, it's the pains of being baby #4).

You're sleeping pretty much through the night. You usually get up around 4 or 4:30 for a quick feeding and then go back down until 7 or later. Since I'm feeding you between 8 and 9 pm for your last feeding, I'd say that's as "through the night" as I can ask for at 3 months old! You're a super eater and a super sleeper :) It makes me happy to feed you and know you're growing so much from what I'm making for you.

Oh that smile and your sweet disposition. You're just a go with the flow baby and we LOVE having you around. We call you "Smiley Wiley" a lot and sometimes I've been calling you "Wy guy". I can't imagine life without my little snuggler a part of it. This next month looks like it will be just as exciting as the last few and we can't wait to live each day with you in it.